On her nightstand was a framed photo I recognized immediately.
Our wedding day.
Sophie had not removed it.
She had turned it facedown.
I stood there for a long moment, staring at the back of the frame.
Then I gently left it exactly as I found it.
In the top drawer, while looking for the charger she had requested, I found a sealed envelope with my name on it.
Ethan.
My heart began to pound.
For several seconds, I held it in my hand, tempted by the weight of it.
Then I placed it back.
Whatever was inside belonged to Sophie until she chose otherwise.
When I returned to the hospital with her things, she noticed something in my face.
“What happened?”
“Nothing.”
She narrowed her eyes.
“You’ve always been terrible at nothing.”
I set the bag down.
“I went to your apartment.”
“I know. I asked you to.”
“I found an envelope.”
The room went still.
Her face changed.
“You read it?”
“No.”
She stared at me, searching for the lie.
There wasn’t one.
After a moment, she looked away.
“Thank you.”
“What is it?”
“A letter.”
“I figured that much.”
She almost smiled, but not quite.
“I wrote it after my first appointment with Dr. Keller.”
My pulse quickened.
“Before the divorce?”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you give it to me?”
She looked toward the window.
“Because by the time I finished writing it, you came home late from work, ate dinner standing at the counter, and told me you were too tired to talk.”
I closed my eyes.
“And the next day?” I asked quietly.
“The next day you said maybe we should get divorced.”
I sank into the chair.
The timing was unbearable.
A letter.
There had been a letter.
Maybe the truth had been sitting in a drawer while I rehearsed my escape.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“I know.”
“Will you let me read it?”
She didn’t answer for a long time.
Then she said, “Not yet.”
I nodded, though disappointment pressed hard against my ribs.
“Okay.”
She looked at me then, almost confused.
“You’re not going to argue?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s yours.”
For a moment, her face seemed to tremble around an emotion she wouldn’t name.
Then she reached for the mystery novel on her bedside table.
“Chapter twelve,” she said quietly.
So I read.
The surgery was scheduled for the following Tuesday.
