Mom was the first to speak.
“I don’t know what your sister told you, but—”
Lilla raised her hand.
« You’ve already messed it up here. »
Mom fell silent.
« Klára said Dad said you need me today. »
Dad moved.
– Little—
« Not a word. Not yet. »
I couldn’t remember the last time I saw it like this.
As a child, he was the one who cried the fastest.
I was the one who got angry first.
Now it’s the other way around.
Lilla spoke softly.
– Mom, you told me this afternoon that Klara has a lot of help with the baby.
Mom looked at me.
“I thought—”
« From where? »
Silence.
« Who did you hear it from? »
« I just knew… »
« From whom? »
Mom didn’t answer.
Lilac continued.
– Dad, you told Klara that you would choose me tonight because I need you.
Dad’s glass was still in his hand.
« I didn’t say it that way. »
“That’s exactly what you said,” I said.
He glanced at me.
« Klára, you are upset. »
I showed my bandaged arm.
« Yes. I have eighteen stitches. »
« I don’t mean that. »
“I know.”
Emma began to squirm in Lilla’s arms.
My sister automatically started rocking me.
Mother’s eyes immediately fell on the baby.
« Give it here, honey. I’ll take it. »
Lilla stepped back.
– No.
Mom’s face changed.
– Little.
« Klára asked you for help. You told her you couldn’t handle it. Now you’re not going to act like you’re a suddenly worried grandmother. »
Dad put down the glass.
« This is getting ridiculous. »
“No,” said Lilla. “It’s starting to get light now.”
We sat down.
I’m on the edge of the chair.
With little Emma by my side.
Our parents against us.
Cold pasta and a half-empty bottle of wine on the table.
“Let’s start with my thirtieth birthday,” said Lilla.
Mom stiffened almost immediately.
« What’s wrong with him? »
– You told me that Klára isn’t coming because she’s tired of everything being about me.
Mom looked at me.
“And you told me that Lilla wouldn’t want me there,” I said.
« Not exactly this— »
I took out my phone.
I found the message.
From three years earlier.
Mom: « I think it would be better if you left it out now. Lilla is in a sensitive period, she doesn’t want tension. »
Lilla was also looking for me.
Then he read his own.
Mom: « Klára is resentful of you again. She says she doesn’t want to go to a night where everything is about you again. Please don’t look for her, you’ll only make things worse. »
There was complete silence in the living room.
Dad looked at Mom.
Not surprised.
That was the first thing Lilla noticed.
“You knew about this,” he said.
Dad frowned.
« Your mother took care of these things. »
« That’s not an answer. »
« I didn’t want to get involved in your conflict. »
Lilla laughed, almost incredulously.
– What conflict? The one he manufactured?
« That’s an exaggeration. »
“Christmas two years ago,” I said.
Lilla has already been looking for you.
My mother wrote to me:
« Lilla would rather be with her friends in the morning, don’t be offended. »
To Lilla:
« Klára would like to spend a few hours with us, please come later. »
Same day.
Two stories.
The Easter lunch.
Celebrating my new job.
Lilla’s move.
Our mother was everywhere.
And somehow, at the end of every broadcast, one of us felt like the other didn’t want him.
“Why?” I asked.
For the first time, real anger appeared on Mom’s face.
« Because you were impossible with each other! »
“Based on what?” Lilla asked.
« There was constant tension. »
« Because you told me that Klara resents me. »
“And to me, Lilla doesn’t want to see me,” I added.
Mom touched her forehead.
« I was just trying to avoid fights. »
“So you lied?” Lilla asked.
« I didn’t lie. »
We both looked at him.
Dad interrupted.
« Well, sometimes your mother simplified things. »
I turned to Lilla.
He is also on me.
Simplified.
That night, it became the new family word for a lie.
“Did you know?” I asked Dad.
He sighed.
« I knew your mother would sometimes tell you things that would make the situation easier. »
“Easier for whom?” I asked.
He didn’t answer.
“You?” I continued. “Because you didn’t have to come up to any of us and say that you really didn’t want to come?”
His gaze hardened.
« That’s disrespectful. »
« You left me in the ER with a newborn tonight because you wanted to drink wine instead. »
Dad stood up.
« Enough. »
Emma flinched.
Lilla immediately pulled him close.
“Sit down,” he said to his father.
Surprised.
« Here you go? »
« You woke the baby. »
Dad sat down.
Lilla rocked Emma until she became quiet again.
The scene was somehow more important than all the shouting.
He took care of me.
I left it.
And our parents sat on opposite sides of the room for the first time, without being able to determine what we thought of each other.
“I still don’t understand,” said Lilla. “Why did you do it?”
Mom started crying.
« Because you are so different. »
« That doesn’t mean you have to lie. »
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